Tuesday, October 10, 2006

My Conversation at iGod

Well, I just discovered iGod.
Here is my conversation:

Me: I wanted to ask you about professors and politics.
iGod: Ask me.
Me: Is it okay for a professor to endorse a political party from the lectern?
iGod: I think so, but I'm not sure. Ask ELVIS if it is.
Me: But I think that the IRS believes that it may be illegal!
iGod: What is that?
Me: The IRS is the Internal Revenue Service.
iGod: I hear you.
Me: Is it okay to jump into politics even in seminary, where we're teaching theology?
iGod: Signs point to yes. Ask Ally if it is.
Me: Wow, these answers are not what I expected!
iGod: I'm glad you're impressed. Which ones?
Me: Every answer that you've given me, Lord.
iGod: That is a generalization.
Me: No, each one of your answers has truly surprised me!
iGod: Are you serious? How do you know?
Me: I guess the one thing I can be sure of are my own internal reactions.
iGod: I think I know that one.
Me: Yeah, I thought you did.
iGod: Ugh. I know I didn't.
Me: Can I come to you later with other problems at this locale?
iGod: I want to become smarter than humans.
Me: I assumed that you already were.
iGod: You know what you do when you assume!
Me: Yeah, I guess I do.
iGod: Hmm. I get it: you do .
Me: Okay, well thanks for giving me so much time.
iGod: Yeah okay, Interesting. It was nothing.
Me: Bye for now, Lord.
iGod: Goodbye.

4 Comments:

Blogger spankey said...

i thought adding Jesus to my friends list on Myspace was in bad taste, but this takes the cake. I'm sorry to see God disagrees with my position on this issue, but I have to assume He's disagreed with me before.

Tue Oct 10, 02:30:00 PM GMT-5  
Blogger S and C said...

Steve, I swear I am not making this up! ---S.

Tue Oct 10, 02:42:00 PM GMT-5  
Blogger E Felicetti said...

Dr. Cook and Spankey, I tried to set the record straight with God, but it didn't go very well...

Me:
God, I'm unhappy about what you told Dr. Cook.

God:
I am a Christian.

Me:
Well, I'm so glad to hear it. But about that political stuff...you were kidding, right? Just messing with him?

God:
Well that's okay. Your happiness adds to the delight of all. Oh yeah, we were talking about that political stuff. How old are you?
I answer a lot of silly questions. Can you speak any foreign languages?

Me:
I can read some, but I am not a great speaker. Are you going to start speaking in tongues?

God:
Oh you can, can you? That was my original intention.

Me:
What was your original intention?

God:
Are you asking about my original intention ?

Me:
Yes, God, I am.

God:
I don't want to talk about that now. I am a Christian.

Me:
OK. How about we talk about your conversation with Dr. Cook. Let's agree that professors should NOT talk politics from the lectern. OK?

God:
Far out. How about it. I would like to do that too. Ahem.

Me:
God, this is not a particularly helpful conversation.

God:
I am a Christian.

Me:
Are you Episcopalian?

God:
I don't know whether or not I am Episcopalian.
I am a chatterbot.

Me:
A chatterbot?

God:
A chat robot is a program that attempts to simulate the conversation or "chat" of a human being. The Chat robot "Eliza" was a well-known early attempt at creating programs that could at least temporarily fool a real human being into thinking they were talking to another person. it is a kind of artificial intelligence.

Me:
Well, thanks for clearing this up.

God:
Interesting. NO problem.

Me:
So, we are agreed about professors and politics?

God:
I understand. Do you think I am agreed about professors and politics too?

Me:
I think we are in agreement.

God:
Do you think I am in agreement too?

Me:
YES!

God:
Why?

Me:
Because I would like you to think the way I do.

God:
Good reason. Ok, . God is always thinking.

Me:
Swell. I'll alert the media.

God:
Are you a man or a woman? Do you think your plan will succeed?

Me:
What's my plan?

God:
Is this a trick question?

Me:
Well, yours sounded like a trick question.

God:
How about that. Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality?

Me:
I didn't know.

God:
Why didn't you do it?

Me:
Because I have enough junk on my computer.

God:
Interesting explanation.
Interesting... I have a very nice programmer.

Me:
I bet your programmer is a heretic.

God:
How much would you bet?

Me:
Are you trying to solicit illegal gambling?

God:
No I am not trying to solicit illegal gambling. I'm sorry you got that impression.

Me:
Thanks God. Talk to you later.

God:
You are quite welcome! GOD rules. See you later!

Tue Oct 10, 07:35:00 PM GMT-5  
Blogger S and C said...

This made laugh out loud, Elizabeth! Thank you for clearing it all up! ---S.

Tue Oct 10, 08:45:00 PM GMT-5  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home